Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
