stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
His hands were made for my vagina.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize