If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
