her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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