Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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