I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
