And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
smell my finger.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
