Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize