i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
