508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
