why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
