New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
We are two peas in an std pod
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
