I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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