my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Enjoy the penises
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
