its not stalking. its research.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize