You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
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