i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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