im gay
i know
yea but for you.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
