But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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