I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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