do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
