Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
