Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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