Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize