Everything about him screamed your future.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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