The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Randomize
