So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
