he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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