Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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