Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
