I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
