smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You can't just leave with hair like that
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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