no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
