Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
