doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
