There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I feel like a drive thru vagina
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
