I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Randomize
