I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
