No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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