Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
