Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I want you more than these girls want KFC
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
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