I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
