god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize