A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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