Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Randomize
