He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
