Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
