I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize