am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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