I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
