I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
